Things We Lost in the Fire

I recently watched “Things We Lost in the Fire.” It was released in 2007 and I can’t tell if it went straight to video or perhaps did not stay long in the theaters, because I'd never heard of it until recently. But I was intrigued and motivated to rent it because of the lead actors. I love, Love, LOVE Benicio Del Toro. Oh, it also starred Halle Berry and David Duchovny. The movie is about a widow, Audrey (Halle) trying to come to grips over the recent, unexpected murder of her husband Brian (Duchovny). Benicio plays Brian's best friend, Jerry, who is also a heroin addict. The two have been friends since 2nd grade and their love for each other has survived their childhood, Brian's marriage and Jerry's addiction. Prior to her husband’s death, Audrey absolutely HATED Jerry. She felt that he was using her husband, and that her husband was wasting his time and money on his friend, time and money that could be better spent with his wife and two kids (who were absolutely adorable, by the way). Interestingly, Jerry is the only one she is able to turn to as she tries to come to terms with her loss.

Through flashbacks, one is able to see the connection between these two men. We come to understand that Jerry was once a lawyer, who kind of got caught up in the fast lane; Brian is a successful land developer. Even when Jerry was deep within his addiction, we saw Brian coming by for visits, taking him out to feed him. Counter to Audrey's suspicions, Brian rarely gave Jerry money, instead, he tended to buy groceries or clothing as needed. More importantly, his attentions reminded them both that Jerry was still a human being who demanded respect and care. Jerry took away much more than a Quarter Pounder during his visits with Brian. The morning of the funeral, Audrey contacts Jerry to tell him of the death of his friend. This turns out to be the one thing that sparks Jerry down the road to recovery. His efforts are aided by Audrey's invitation to move into the spare room. This, of course was totally unrealistic; we’re to believe that this mother of two young children will knowingly invite an addict into her home??!! Well, if he were as fine as Benicio, I suppose it’s possible, right? But I digress.

I won’t spoil the ending for you, but I can bet it’s not the one you’re thinking. Anyway, I started thinking about commitment. What does it mean and what inspires us to this end? What is it that draws two people together and forge a bond such that others, circumstance, sickness and health, or even death, cannot break? Obviously it’s not just about blood ties or even a marital contract. In fact, the only point of conflict in Audrey and Brian's marriage was Jerry, but on this one issue, Brian would not budge away from his friendship with Jerry, even to please Audrey. On the surface, Brian and Jerry are complete opposites and it’s hard to see what they could possibly have in common. But as you look deeper, even beyond the addiction, you come to realize that these were both “good” men; that is, decent, concerned about others, self confident, and with a strong sense of honor. The friendship that developed between the two of them in their childhood was something as strong, if not stronger than blood ties. Whatever it was, it allowed Brian to see Jerry for who he was and who he could be, and not just see him or even to judge him based on his current circumstance. In fact, this is not far from the way that Jesus loves me and the way I am learning to love my son.

Commitment is more than a feeling and is not based on anything as transient as emotion. One makes a conscious decision to love someone for the long haul, regardless of circumstances or how time may change or alter the person. As difficult as things have been with my son and I, the commitment I made to him, the love I have for him will sustain us even in these dark times. True commitment and love comes without strings or conditions. I am absolutely confident that God will have His way in our lives, which is probably why Satan is giving us such a hard time right now. This is my affirmation.

Anyway, check out the movie if you get a chance. Besides having a nice message and touching storyline, Benicio Del Toro is so doggone FINE!! (He's a really good actor too!) Can someone PLEASE get me an introduction!!