I know I indicated that I would update this story weekly, but it is developing more quickly than I anticipated; this young woman has a story to tell and is not inclined to wait on my time frame. You can find the first installment here.
Photo by Kate Kerrigan (www.katekerrigan.net)
Rainy Days
One year earlier.
“Hello?” I answered, annoyance evident all through my voice, as I struggled to hold the phone with my left shoulder while trying to control 3,000 pounds of metal rolling down the interstate at 75 mph., “yeah, who is it?”
The silence on the other end was palpable.
“Who is this?!” I demanded, just seconds from pushing the “END’ button on my cell phone.
“Nandi? Where you at, baby?” a soft, concerned voice inquired.
“Mama? Hey, uhmm, can I call you back? I’m on the interstate right now and traffic is heavy. I should be home in about 15 minutes. I’ll call you then, ok?”
“Nandi, I need you to meet me here at the hospital,” my mother insisted.
“Wh. . . hospital? Are you all right? What’s wrong?” I demanded, focusing in on her for the first time.
“Baby, I’m fine, but I need you to come on up here to the Baptist Hospital”
“But, mama,” I began my protest, but she continued speaking as if I had not interrupted,
“I’ll wait for you at the Emergency Room entrance.”
“Mama, what’s going on?!” I demanded a straight answer, panic was starting to settle somewhere in the pit of my stomach.
“Baby, I’m not going to get into this over the phone. You just get on up here and I’ll explain everything then.” The connection between us ended.
I tossed the phone carelessly back into my purse and then searched for the nearest exit that would allow me to re-route my trip towards the hospital. As I did so, I took a quick, mental inventory of my extended family members and wondered which one of them had fallen sick or been in an accident. My breathing quickened when I realized that this would not get me the answers I needed and I concentrated on reaching my destination quickly and safely.
Upon reaching the hospital, I briefly searched for a parking space and then decided to take a chance on a ticket or tow by parking near the emergency room entrance. The tapping of my heels kept time with my breathing, while I anxiously searched for the face of my mother. I finally caught sight of her sitting stooped over in one of the bank of chairs near the nurse’s station. As I got closer, I realized that she was praying. Dread consumed me.
“Mama, what’s going on now? I’m here. Who’s hurt?” Before she could speak, my two brothers and their wives came around the corner. Both men had their arms wrapped securely around their wives.
“Ok, y’all are scaring me! What is going ON??!! Who’s hurt?”
“Come on, baby, sit down,” she began,
“No, mama, just tell me, PLEASE.” I was afraid that I already knew.
She took my hands and pulled me to the nearest chair. “Baby, there’s been an accident. Kai’s car was blindsided by an 18 wheeler this afternoon. They tried to call you, but you didn’t answer your phone. They called me instead as the next of kin.” Her eyes began to leak as she looked imploringly into mine,
“Baby, Kai’s gone.”
“No, mama, you are mistaken. Y’all are making a mistake. I spoke to my husband not three hours ago, things were fine. He was gonna pick up Micah this afternoon since I had a late meeting . . .” I paused when my sister in law, Carolyn broke off a choked cry and turned her face into my brother’s shoulder.
“Nandi,” my mother drew my attention back to her, “listen to me. There has been no mistake. I identified him myself. But baby, there is more. . .”
“Mama, stop now,” I interrupted coldly, “I told you Kai is fine. He and Micah probably stopped off to get some ice cream or something. I keep telling that man that it ruins Micah’s appetite for dinner, but does he listen to me? Of course not!” I scoffed of her concerned looks.
“Baby, I need you to look at me and I need you to hear me,” she said, much more sternly, “Kai was killed this afternoon in a car accident. He had Micah with him. . .”
“Mama, stop,” I interrupted, furious with her. Why was she trying to hurt me with these ridiculous lies?
“Micah was badly hurt and they are prepping him for surgery,” she continued, brutally. “He’s alive baby, but they’re not giving us any hope. I need you to come with me now to give the doctor permission to begin surgery.”
I looked at her then and could not think of a word to say to her. Nothing she’d just said was true, of course, but I couldn’t figure out why she would get me down here this way. I was so cold, deep down. It didn’t even help to rub my hands up and down my arms; this cold was bone deep. It defied the 90 degree heat outside.
I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing emerged, not even air. My mother stood up and pulled me gently to my feet. She took my left arm, while my brother, Aaron took firm hold of my right. Together they led me to the nurse’s station. We were directed to the office of the surgeon who, in a matter of fact tone, informed me of the death of my husband, my life partner for the past 10 years, my friend. My love.
“Hello?” I answered, annoyance evident all through my voice, as I struggled to hold the phone with my left shoulder while trying to control 3,000 pounds of metal rolling down the interstate at 75 mph., “yeah, who is it?”
The silence on the other end was palpable.
“Who is this?!” I demanded, just seconds from pushing the “END’ button on my cell phone.
“Nandi? Where you at, baby?” a soft, concerned voice inquired.
“Mama? Hey, uhmm, can I call you back? I’m on the interstate right now and traffic is heavy. I should be home in about 15 minutes. I’ll call you then, ok?”
“Nandi, I need you to meet me here at the hospital,” my mother insisted.
“Wh. . . hospital? Are you all right? What’s wrong?” I demanded, focusing in on her for the first time.
“Baby, I’m fine, but I need you to come on up here to the Baptist Hospital”
“But, mama,” I began my protest, but she continued speaking as if I had not interrupted,
“I’ll wait for you at the Emergency Room entrance.”
“Mama, what’s going on?!” I demanded a straight answer, panic was starting to settle somewhere in the pit of my stomach.
“Baby, I’m not going to get into this over the phone. You just get on up here and I’ll explain everything then.” The connection between us ended.
I tossed the phone carelessly back into my purse and then searched for the nearest exit that would allow me to re-route my trip towards the hospital. As I did so, I took a quick, mental inventory of my extended family members and wondered which one of them had fallen sick or been in an accident. My breathing quickened when I realized that this would not get me the answers I needed and I concentrated on reaching my destination quickly and safely.
Upon reaching the hospital, I briefly searched for a parking space and then decided to take a chance on a ticket or tow by parking near the emergency room entrance. The tapping of my heels kept time with my breathing, while I anxiously searched for the face of my mother. I finally caught sight of her sitting stooped over in one of the bank of chairs near the nurse’s station. As I got closer, I realized that she was praying. Dread consumed me.
“Mama, what’s going on now? I’m here. Who’s hurt?” Before she could speak, my two brothers and their wives came around the corner. Both men had their arms wrapped securely around their wives.
“Ok, y’all are scaring me! What is going ON??!! Who’s hurt?”
“Come on, baby, sit down,” she began,
“No, mama, just tell me, PLEASE.” I was afraid that I already knew.
She took my hands and pulled me to the nearest chair. “Baby, there’s been an accident. Kai’s car was blindsided by an 18 wheeler this afternoon. They tried to call you, but you didn’t answer your phone. They called me instead as the next of kin.” Her eyes began to leak as she looked imploringly into mine,
“Baby, Kai’s gone.”
“No, mama, you are mistaken. Y’all are making a mistake. I spoke to my husband not three hours ago, things were fine. He was gonna pick up Micah this afternoon since I had a late meeting . . .” I paused when my sister in law, Carolyn broke off a choked cry and turned her face into my brother’s shoulder.
“Nandi,” my mother drew my attention back to her, “listen to me. There has been no mistake. I identified him myself. But baby, there is more. . .”
“Mama, stop now,” I interrupted coldly, “I told you Kai is fine. He and Micah probably stopped off to get some ice cream or something. I keep telling that man that it ruins Micah’s appetite for dinner, but does he listen to me? Of course not!” I scoffed of her concerned looks.
“Baby, I need you to look at me and I need you to hear me,” she said, much more sternly, “Kai was killed this afternoon in a car accident. He had Micah with him. . .”
“Mama, stop,” I interrupted, furious with her. Why was she trying to hurt me with these ridiculous lies?
“Micah was badly hurt and they are prepping him for surgery,” she continued, brutally. “He’s alive baby, but they’re not giving us any hope. I need you to come with me now to give the doctor permission to begin surgery.”
I looked at her then and could not think of a word to say to her. Nothing she’d just said was true, of course, but I couldn’t figure out why she would get me down here this way. I was so cold, deep down. It didn’t even help to rub my hands up and down my arms; this cold was bone deep. It defied the 90 degree heat outside.
I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing emerged, not even air. My mother stood up and pulled me gently to my feet. She took my left arm, while my brother, Aaron took firm hold of my right. Together they led me to the nurse’s station. We were directed to the office of the surgeon who, in a matter of fact tone, informed me of the death of my husband, my life partner for the past 10 years, my friend. My love.
3 comments:
I like. I was tearing up reading it. Looking forward to the rest.
Speechless..touching n tearing..
Thank you, Chhiyaishi! Come back anytime!
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