My child, the pugilist

Ok, I gotta admit, that this was kinda how I was feeling yesterday. I went to collect my child from his daycare yesterday afternoon and was pulled aside by the director/owner.

"We have a problem."

Before I asked her to continue, I looked over at my child, who was staring at me in defiance, with his lip poked out, almost daring me to contradict him.

Hmmmm.

Anyway, for the last couple days, I was told, my child has been physically fighting with another child, a little 8 year old boy. Right in the middle of the director's story, my child interrupted, crying and screamed,

"He was talking about me, saying things to hurt my feelings, I don't like kids to hurt my feelings. And he called you ugly; you're not ugly. I wasn't gonna let him punk me out."

You may recall the conversation we had a couple months on this topic and the advice I gave to him? Well, here it is, biting me in the butt.

So, the short of the story is that everyone agreed that the other child had been provoking my heart and soul. The first time it happened, he and the boy started fighting, the adults broke it up put them both in time out and that was the end of it; they didn't even tell me about it. But since then, whenever my heart and soul gets within striking distance of this kid, he would say something smart or hit the boy. Over and over again.

Oh, and I didn't mention that two weeks ago, he came home with his first black eye. He was proud of it, by the way, as he described what the other kid looked like in comparison with his own "just a scratch, mommy!" Again, he responded appropriately, according to the director, and though I didn't like it, I didn't really address it with him. Mostly because he did what I told him to do.

Ok, so fast forward back to yesterday. I am now torn on how to respond. To be clear, I don't want him to let other kids to pick on him. I want him to feel like he can and should defend himself when needed, but I don't want him turning into a bully either.

So, this is a call for advice from all single mothers raising boys and to the men: I need my lil stinker to come back a little towards the middle. So, what do I say or communicate to him in a way he can understand?

Notable Writing Contests- FYI

top SELECTED SHORTS WRITING CONTEST The folks at NPR's acclaimed program, Selected Shorts, are sponsoring a writing competition with a very unique prize. The winning submission, selected by Ann Patchett, will be read as part of the Selected Shorts performance at Symphony Space on May 20, 2009. The story will be recorded for possible later broadcast as part of the public radio series. The winner will receive $1000. Entry deadline is March 6, 2009. Find rules and entry instructions at SymphonySpace.org. THE L MAGAZINE WANTS YOUR SHORT FICTION The L Magazine is proud to announce the fifth annual Literary Upstart, The Search for Pocket Fiction. Writers are encouraged to submit their best previously unpublished short fiction. Semi-finalists will be invited to participate in one of three live readings at a dark and writerly NYC tavern. The three semi-finalists will also be published in The L Magazine’s annual Summer Fiction Issue. First entry deadline is April 15, 2009. Find details and entry instructions here. THE WRITER 2009 SHORT-STORY CONTEST America's leading monthly writing magazine, The Writer, is now accepting entries for the 2009 Short-Story Contest. First prize is $1,000 and publication in the magazine. Entry deadline is May 31, 2009. Learn more and enter at WriterMag.com. GOTHAM'S 100-WORD WRITING CONTEST For a chance to win a free 10-week writing workshop, dazzle us with a piece of writing that is no more than 100 words. You may use any topic and any form—fiction, nonfiction, or poetry. As Strunk and White say, "Vigorous writing is concise." Entry deadline is April 3, 2009. Learn more and enter at WritingClasses.com. TEEN WRITING CONTEST Gotham has teamed with Sonya Sones, Simon & Schuster publishing, and Teen Ink for a truly original writing competition - The What My Girlfriend Doesn't Know Writing Contest. Teens are invited to enter for a chance to win a free online writing class. Entry deadline is April 3, 2009. Learn more and enter here.

Thursdays Writing Challenge Update

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Writing Challenge update

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Frazz

Problem Solving 101

Lent

Today is the first day of the Lenten season. Neither my church nor my faith requires the period of fasting and sacrifice that is required by some denominations, but I personally see the value in the discipline that is needed to maintain this daily sacrifice for 40 days.

So, while I'm not required to participate in this process, I usually do, just for my own personal growth. Rather than take something away, however, I usually try to add something to my daily life and routine that has been lacking. I do my best to perform this act daily through Easter and my prayer is that it will be something that I can continue even throughout the year. There is research that says it takes months for successful behavior change to take place, so there you go.

I am a spontaneous woman. I like to do things off the cuff, so to speak. I am at my best when performing for a short deadline. I'm kind of a sprinter, I can give intense bursts of energy for a short period of time. I have never been able to run long distances or marathons. Never. Not even at my peak of fitness.

This translates also, unfortunately, in my approach to my day to day problems. It is really hard for me to plan for the distant future; I need the immediate feedback from short goals.

For example, I have a goal to lose X number of pounds; I'm having trouble meeting that goal because I can't see immediate change; then I lose interest and move on to something else. I am doing very well (for me) with my goal to write daily. I want to continue to do that, because I know me; it wouldn't take much for this to fall down the list of hundreds of daily life things that I need to prioritize.

I've been doing a lot of reflection and praying lately, asking for guidance, trying to understand this about myself. I mean, it's one thing to know it but the change process is intense. So, I'm searching for my own triggers to self sabatage.

A mentor once told me that I had many traits of an obsessive compulsive disorder or perfectionism. I laughed in her face and then pointed out to her, "how can you even say that? you've been to my house!" Seriously, y'all, I need a housekeeper in the worst kind of way. At the best of times, cleaning house is at the bottom of my most fun activities, but when I'm busy and overtaxed, it falls even further down my priority list.

But my mentor was insistent with her belief and pointed out things that she felt was evidence to support her theory. When she finished, and unfortunately, it took her awhile to do that, I had to own up to at least some of what she said. I'm not a neat freak, but I do like things done in a certain way. When I clean, my environment becomes spotless. I live with two dogs and a busy, barely pays attention little boy. There is no way that my house can stay spotless without my working at it all the time. So, I know that I can't maintain it, so I don't do it. She believes that one of the reasons that I am the perfect parent for my particular child is that I provide for him a highly structured home environment, something that had been missing in his foster care placements and fulfills his need for stability.

The downside of this, is that without immediate feedback, I get more easily frustrated than some (parenting stuff) and I think, this taps into my fear of failing and so I quit or lose interest (other stuff).

So, for this Lenten season, I am setting two long term goals, long for me at least. For the next 40 days, I will exercise daily for at least 30 minutes; more if I can fit in the time, but no less than 30. Past experience tells me that if I can just make this a part of my daily routine, it will become reinforcing and I won't have to force myself to do it, I will WANT to do it, just like I now want to eat. So, this time will help me to re-establish it as part of my daily routine.

The second goal relates to my writing schedule; I feel the impact of my perfectionism here most of all. I have imposed a couple deadlines on myself; I want to be close to finishing this novel at least by August. I have plans to attend a writing conference that will include networking with both editors and agents of some major publishing houses. I will even have an opportunity to pitch my novel to an editor (10 whole minutes, y'all) and so I want this thing to be polished.

Because of this, I am reviewing and editing, and reviewing and editing the chapters that I have already produced, but I am stalled at producing the rest of it. At the pace I am now working, I'll be lucky to have this thing done by Feb 2010!! Ok, it's not that bad, but I'm taking this as a warning to myself.

So, goal number two. I will write, at my PC, with no editing or reviewing, for at least one hour 5 days a weeks. When I make myself focus, I can produce anywhere between 1000 to 2000 words during this time and so this pace would better suit my goals. The rest of the time, I can feed my need to edit, but during that time, I am just allowing my imagination and fingers to flow.

This may sound easy, but for me, this will make the next month or so extremely challenging. I will document my progress daily for the sake of accountability. Starting TODAY!

This could be painful. . .

Yikes!! I'm taking care of a feverish seven year old today and trying to fight off my own possible cold, but overall, things are good.

It's Friday, which always suggests unknown and exciting possibilities. I'm hoping my kid is feeling better by tomorrow; his best friend is having a birthday party and they've done nothing but talk about it all week.

Writing is a big part of my world these days, so forgive me if it gets mentioned every few days (or every few hours for my real life friends!!). It's even more so lately, because I am trying to meet a couple deadlines.

I've been seeking and getting really good advice from professional writers and artists and each agree that it's not enough to produce quality product. Professional writing is just like any other business, is a who you know game, less so than what you know.

That's fine; it's the same in my current career, so I'm trying to get myself into this game too. I know there are other aspiring writers out there, so I'll share a couple pearls of advice that have been offered up to me:

1) attend at least one writer's conference each year.

The value in this is not just an opportunity to improve your craft, but this is a major networking opportunity. Typically, authors, editors, agents and publisher's are congregating in one place. What better place to introduce your project and even receive feedback? I just registered for one in my region, hence my deadline.

2) join a writer's group.

it's a way of getting others to give you direct feedback on your current projects and assistance in working out plot or just picking up new ideas. I'm still searching for a writer's group in my local area, but I found a really good online writer's group. It's just been a full week, but I'm already benefiting.

3) write something daily.

Even if you feel yourself getting stuck on your current project, continue to write anyway. Whether it's a blog post, a haiku, a journal entry, SOMETHING! Ideas or inspiration can come from anywhere. Perhaps you just need to step away and gain a new perspective.

4) professional writing is a BUSINESS.

Get to know the business side of things and know it well. There is currently a big market out there for self-publishers. But as with anything, there are scammers out there too, so be certain to read the fine print. If you're seeking representation from an agent, be certain to read their ethical guidelines and learn the business standard in terms of fees and such. Some of them aren't right, either. If you decide to go the traditional route and seek publication from one of the major publishing houses, be certain to research their submission guidelines. Failure to follow even one of their steps could result in your work ending up in a mile high slush pile.

5) Seek out and enter contests

This one is kind of a companion to #1 and #3. If you seek to write daily, your work will continue to improve; by entering contests, you open your work up to possible feedback from your peers, which may also help to improve your writing. And if you start winning contest, then you gain the benefit of name recognition, which may push you even closer to your goal for publication.

Ok, had to get that out. Now back to our regularly scheduled programming. . .

And then THIS MESS

Have you seen this?

If the graphic fails use this link: http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/feb/18/new-york-post-cartoon-race

New York Post in racism row over chimpanzee cartoon

African-American activist Al Sharpton claims newspaper may have portrayed Barack Obama using racist imagery

• Oliver Burkeman in Washington
• guardian.co.uk, Wednesday 18 February 2009 18.58 GMT
• Article history

This New York Post cartoon depicts police shooting a chimpanzee

At first glance, the main editorial cartoon in today's New York Post seemed like just another lurid reference to the story that the tabloid had been covering with breathless abandon for two days running - the shooting by Connecticut police on Monday of a pet chimpanzee that viciously attacked his owner's friend.

But the caption cast the cartoon in a more sinister light. "They'll have to find someone else to write the next stimulus bill," it read, prompting accusations that the Post was peddling a longstanding racist slur by portraying president Barack Obama, who signed the bill into law yesterday, as an ape.

In a statement issued today, Al Sharpton, the Baptist minister and civil rights activist, called the cartoon "troubling at best, given the historic racist attacks [on] African-Americans as being synonymous with monkeys".

He added: "Being that the stimulus bill has been the first legislative victory of President Barack Obama ... and has become synonymous with him, it is not a reach to wonder: are they inferring that a monkey wrote the last bill?... The Post should at best clarify what point they were trying to make, or in fact reprimand their cartoonist."

David Paterson, the governor of New York state, told a local television station that it was "very important for the New York Post to explain what the cartoon was intended to portray".

In response, the newspaper's editor-in-chief, Col Allen, noted Sharpton's love of media attention. "The cartoon is a clear parody of a current news event, to wit the shooting of a violent chimpanzee in Connecticut," he said. "It broadly mocks Washington's efforts to revive the economy. Again, Al Sharpton reveals himself as nothing more than a publicity opportunist."

T-shirts portraying Obama as the children's book character Curious George, a monkey, made occasional appearances among audience members at Republican rallies during last year's election campaign, and a similar stuffed doll continues to be advertised online.

The Post's cartoonist Sean Delonas, meanwhile, has frequently been accused of bigotry: the New York gossip blog Gawker once nicknamed him "the Picasso of prejudice".

The criticism has centred on his portrayals of gay characters, which have linked homosexuality to bestiality. The pressure group Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation has repeatedly called his work "juvenile" and "immature".

The Post, which is owned by Rupert Murdoch, endorsed Obama over Hillary Clinton in the Democratic primaries, but John McCain in the general election.

WTH??!!

Here's one for the WTH? files:

About This Video

Title: "Drunken Negro Face" Cookies On Sale at Greenwich Village Bakery

Description: Ted Kefalinos, proprietor of Lafayette French Pastry, asked her, "Would you like some drunken nigger heads to go with your coffee? They're in honor of our new president. He's following in the same path of Abraham Lincoln; he will get his."

Duration: 4:32

http://www.blackbottom.com/watch.php?v=uDvdMGxFpzw


Now, I admit, I hesitated to post the link to this video because I really dislike giving attention to idiots and bigots, especially those who are obviously willing to do or say anything to get attention. But, I thought about it again and decided that I wanted to be a part of the group that exposed this man as the blatant racist, hate-filled idiot that he is. And don't be lulled into thinking he is harmless just because he openly displays his hatred.

If he's not actively involved with an organized group of other bigots, he is giving courage to someone else to act on the very ideals he is promoting.

I am now wondering why he is not jailed. He openly expressed the desire for the assassination of our president. Shouldn't that concern someone other than me?

I would think black and colored folk in general who live and work in Greenich Village would be concerned about EATING anything that comes from his bakery. He obviously holds anyone not like him in disdain.

And while I would not condone openly confronting this idiot, I think if I lived in New York, that I would make it my business to slowly run this ass out of business.

I'm just saying. . .

Wednesday Morning Humor

Have a great day, everybody!!

The Color Quiz Personality Test

Ok, so I admit it. . . I was goofing off again. But this time, I came across a real find. The Color Quiz test is sited as a personality test and apparently colors that "move" you or make you feel things make some comment about your personality.

Most of the time, these things are a joke for me. I have studied and even assisted in creating some of these doggone tests, and so when I take them, I know what they're looking for and the results are based on my responding in the correct manner rather than me giving honest responses of my true feelings. I really don't do that on purpose.

Anyway, I like this test because there is no cognitive component, your responses are solely coming from an emotional, instintual place, ergo, no way to second guess. This is probably one of the few tests that have given an accurate description of my nature.

So, I'm going to expose my tender regions to y'all. Be gentle!!

******************************************************************************

Your Existing Situation

Hopes to obtain an improved position and greater prestige, so that she can
procure for herself more of the things she has had to do without.

Your Stress Sources

The existing situation is disagreeable. Has an unsatisfied need to ally herself
with others whose standards are as high as her own, and to stand out from the
rank and file. Her control of her sensual instincts restricts her ability to
give herself, but the resulting isolation leads to the urge to surrender and
allow herself to merge with another. This disturbs her. as such instincts are
regarded as weaknesses to be overcome; she feels that only by continued
self-restraint can she hope to maintain her attitude of individual superiority.
Wants to be loved or admired for herself alone; needs attention, recognition,
and the esteem of others.

Your Restrained Characteristics

Circumstances are restrictive and hampering, forcing her to forgo all joys and
pleasures for the time being.
Circumstances are such that she feels forced to
compromise for the time being if she is to avoid being cut off from affection or
from full participation.


Your Desired Objective

Longs for tenderness and for a sensitivity of feeling into which she can blend.
Responsive to anything esthetic and tasteful.

Your Actual Problem

Wants to be valued and respected, and seeks this from a close and peaceful
association of mutual esteem.

Your Actual Problem #2

Needs to achieve a stable and peaceful condition, enabling her to free herself
of the worry that she may be prevented from achieving all the things she wants.

Thank you for using http://www.ColorQuiz.com/

"The Runaway" Daily Word count

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Actually, I wrote 974 words in 30 minutes. I did something goofy before I hit the "done" button, which made it look like I amsuperwoman for real!! I am trying to be disciplined in writing this novel and so I have a goal to write something every day. So far however, I find myself writing throughout the day, and in any spare moment I have. These characters continue to talk to me even when I'm sleeping. Can you tell I'm excited??!!

I'm still choosing

You know, sometimes it does not pay to tell some folk about good things that are happening in your life, or even just to express your satisfaction with life in general. I don't know if this is a reflection of the universe trying to restore balance, satan just f'ing with me, or haters and their life philosophy of misery loving company.

Yesterday, it seemed that everywhere I turned I was faced with negativity and funky attitudes, with people trying extra hard to show me how little I mattered to them. At one point, I realized that I had an awful knot in the pit of my stomach, found myself fighting back tears and was overwhelmed by feelings of loneliness and sadness.

So, I went back and re-read my previous post and was reminded that I alone am responsible for my happiness and that happiness is a choice, not based on a feeling or a certain set of circumstances. And it did the trick. I shook that isht off, turned my phone off, made myself invisible on IM and ignored all but positive emails. I then snuggled up on the couch with my child and two dogs; yes, we were all under the covers together, laughing and generally feeling good about being with each other, watching Madagascar 2: Back to Africa.

I'm still choosing to be happy; sadness and depression is not an option.

So, to any and all who think to bring negative energy into my world today:

I am a Raider and an Adventuress

Once again, I am goofing off when I should be working. I had an awesome weekend and am having a little trouble redirecting my focus back to work. Or at least, that's the story I'm telling!

What Classic Movie Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

Happy Valentine's Day

To each of my blogosprere friends, my prayer is that this holiday, you will have the BEST Valentine's Day EVER!

I love you and I thank you for giving me a reason each day to turn on my computer!


1 Corinthians 13: 4-7

"Love is very patient, very kind; Love never boils with jealousy; Love is never envious, never boastful, it is not arrogant, is never rude, never selfish, bares no malice; Love is never glad when others go wrong, but joyfully sides with the truth; Love knows no limit to its endurance, always hopeful."

The Runaway - Emma's escape

Today, I am introducing the final in my series of character studies from my up and coming novel, The Runaway. Allow me to introduce to you, Emma. Now, you may be wondering how she fits in with the other characters you've met so far, given that she lives and functions in 1864, but I'm going to have to ask you to extend to me a little trust. Her story touches and influences the lives of several of the present day characters in very significant ways. You will find out how when the novel is completed.

Story premise:

A young woman is found unconscious and bleeding from a gunshot in an alley. She has no identification and there are no witnesses to her assault. She is taken to the hospital where she eventually regains consciousness but has no memory for her identity.

With the help of a police detective and her neurologist, she works to regain the pieces of her missing life. Over time, memories begin to surface, leading to clues about her identity. The clock is ticking, however, for buried within her locked subconscious are the clues not only to the murder attempt on her life, but the details of an assassination plot on an African American candidate for the presidency of the United States.

Emma’s Escape

Good afternoon. My name is Emma. I am nineteen years old. I am owned by massa Horace and Letitia Kramer-George. We live on the George plantation in Montgomery County, Georgia. My early childhood was good and was fairly comfortable, despite the fact I was a slave. That is, until I reached my fourteenth year. That was about the time that ole massa George took notice of me and began to whisper foul things in my ear. I did not fully understand all of the things he said to me, but I knew enough to know they should not be said to a well-brought up young lady.

As you might have guessed, I was not fully aware that I was a slave before then. My grandmother had earned a certain degree of respect in our community, even amongst the white folk. She was given a house set apart from slave quarters. I never knew my mother; I believe that she may have been sold away to another plantation but no one has ever actually spoken to me about it. My Nana is the only mother I’ve ever known. I was allowed to attend school and learned how to read and write; indeed, I attended lessons right along sides of Ms. Laura. That is, until my ninth year when I was put to work full time in the kitchens. My lessons continued however for several years longer, as Ms Laura would sneak down to the kitchen and teach me things she had learned that day. As I look back now though, I could guess that she did it, not so much for me, but to spite her parents.

As I said, despite my status, I would say that my early childhood was a happy one until my fourteenth year. Massa George continued to look and talk to me in ways that made me extremely uncomfortable. He would ever offer the occasional present, but it remained just that, talk. I did my best to avoid being around him and would always run away if he came upon me suddenly. It was not until much later that I understood that he allowed me to run from him; that at any point, he had the right to demand my complete obedience, as I was nothing more to him than his property. I would dare say that it was his “respect” for my Nana that stayed his hands all those years. I am fairly certain that my age had little to do with it, you see, I was familiar with the rumors about girls as young as twelve having children or being sold away suddenly or under mysterious circumstances.

Things changed, however, in my sixteenth year. I suppose, Massa George figured he had no further need to wait and he took me. That day seemed but as yesterday, so well I remember it. I could look for no protection from my Nana or from anyone else, for that matter. I implored him to reconsider but it was for naught. When I continued to resist, he grabbed me and told me that I belonged to him, I was his property, and therefore subject to his will in all things. I was obliged to do whatever he told me to do, whenever I was told to do it.

That day, I lost more than my physical innocence. That day, I fully understood what it meant to be owned by another person, to be nothing more than a piece of merchandise, to be a slave. To have no say in what happened to my body; to have no one willing or able to intervene on my behalf. That was the day I realized there was no such thing as justice. I figured out that day that Nana and all those other ole slaves had it wrong. That white God they prayed to and cast all their cares upon, cared only for free white folk. The slave had only themselves and that was only a paltry little bit.

I was eventually with child. I had, at least initially, no particular feel about it one way or another. I had become immune to all feeling, dealing as I was with constant debasement and humiliation. The day the mid-wife placed this white, red-faced, screaming babe in my arms, I looked at it and her in confusion. How could this blue eyed-blond child emerge from my loins? The child and I looked at each other for the longest time, both of us appearing to come to terms with the other. He closed his eyes and then rested trustingly in my arms, and it was then I knew that he truly belonged to me.

He brought me back to life, my blue-eyed baby boy. Nothing could touch me, not even the debased and foul acts that the ole massa continued to inflict upon me daily. I endured it all because I knew that in the evenings, my baby boy would fill me with a joy that nothing in this evil world could ever taint.

I should have known that this would not last; that joy and happiness is a luxury not bestowed upon slaves. Children born to slaves are still slaves. I should have realized that. They are trusted to their parents only for safekeeping and liable to be demanded at any point. Ms Lettie got sight of my baby boy one afternoon as she drove past headed into town. She knew immediately how my child came to be. Anyone with eyes to see would know that babe was begat by Massa George, what with the blond hair and bright blues eyes. Those same eyes possessed by every male in the George family clan.

Ms. Lettie devised a plan more evil than anything the old massa had done to that point. The consequences of which will be felt for generations to come.

***********************************************************************

For those of you who have followed this series, thank you so much for you reading and for offering your comments and feedback. They have been very helpful in refining the original idea I had for this novel.

I have completed Act One, which is the first 6 chapters, and I know how it will end, so Act Three is also nearly complete. Act Two will be the most difficult and time intensive, and so, bear with me.

I'll let you know when it's done.

Thanks again!!

Fabulousness

My FABULOUS blog pal, Sharon, has decreed that my blog is noteworthy in it's fabulousness!! I'm FABULOUS, y'all! I feel so honored. *wipes tear from corner of eye.*

Thank you, Sharon, I do my best! LOL! J/K. I really appreciate you thinking about me.

So, just as I've been tagged, I must now pass this award forward to other fabulous bloggers, which I will do in just a few.

My other assignment is to list 5 Addictions that I have. Hmmm. Ok, here goes:

MY FIVE ADDICTIONS:

1. Movies, movies and more movies. Classics, adverture, thrillers, psychological dramas, comedies, romantic comedies, mysteries. You name it, I watch it. I LOVE MOVIES!

2. Chocolate. Milk chocolate, truffles, Godiva gourmet chocolate, Hershey's kisses, Dove bars and the LOVER, all 5'11" of pure, sweet chocolate!

3. Writing. I have become so consumed with this addiction, that I carry a leather bound journal with me every where I go and it sits on the bedside table when I go to bed. And I do mean, EVERY where. People were looking at me sideways in church this morning when I pulled out my journal and started writing down an idea during the pastor's sermon. Oh well. The Lord knows my heart.

4. Red wine. I won't actually call this an addiction, since by definition, I don't meet the criteria for dependence and withdrawal, but I really, really enjoy a good bottle of red. I wish I could see the white wines in the same way, because, the reds tend to interfere with sleep (tannin) and leave me feeling hung over the next day, but the smoothness of the going down more than makes up for this inconvenience. Well, shoot, maybe this IS an addiction?

5. I'm going to call this last one a guilty pleasure instead of an addiction. Television dramas, in particular, 24, Mad Men, Perry Mason (the original series, not the junk put out in the 80's) and I Love Lucy.

The blogs I would like to tag have already been awarded, so I'll just mention them here:
The True Urban Queen, MsKnowItAll, Sitting on the Big Porch, MsTeeJaye and Mike. I strongly encourage you to stop by and check them all out.

Happy Birthday, Monopoly!

Monopoly has always been one of my favorite games. It's hard to believe that it was initially created in 1935 and has survived, been revitalized and continues to bring joy to hundreds year after year.

Happy Birthday!

Please sign petition

Dear MoveOn member,

Last Friday, Sen. Claire McCaskill took to the Senate floor and said what I imagine a lot of us have been thinking about Wall Street lately:

"They don't get it. These people are idiots. You can't use taxpayer money to pay out $18 billion in bonuses...What planet are these people on?"¹

Sen. McCaskill was reacting to the $18.4 billion in bonuses that Wall Street bankers took home in 2008. $18.4 billion going to the people who crippled our economy with their recklessness and greed and then took $700 billion of our money.²

Yesterday, President Obama took an important first step, limiting pay at companies taking bailouts going forward.³ But Congress is considering going even further, applying the limits retroactively and even taking back some of the most extravagant bonuses at firms that took taxpayer money.⁴

A huge public outcry will give them momentum and push them to real action. Can you sign this petition to Congress, urging them to act now to rein in Wall Street greed? Clicking here will add your name:

http://pol.moveon.org/bonus/o.pl?id=15503-12460663-0.DJbrx&t=3

The petition says: "Congress must place enforceable, common-sense limits on salaries at all the banks that have taken taxpayer dollars."

Wall Street's defenders make all kinds of excuses about why the bonuses were justified. They say that bonuses are an accepted part of compensation packages on Wall Street, that those receiving bonuses weren't the ones who lost their firms billions of dollars, and that they need to pay bonuses to retain top talent.⁵

Those arguments are outrageous.

If automatic bonuses are a part of Wall Street culture, that culture has to change—a firm that's still afloat only because of huge taxpayer bailouts shouldn't be paying bonuses. And while tens of thousands of Wall Street employees are losing their jobs, it's hard to believe that those still employed will go looking for new positions because they didn't get a bonus.

Sen. McCaskill showed courage standing up to the status quo. We've got to show the rest of Congress that this is the kind of leadership we need to get us out of this crisis and make the economy work for all Americans. Limiting pay at companies taking bailouts won't fix our financial system—that will take a lot more hard work—but it's an important first step.

Can you tell Congress to rein in Wall Street's excesses now and then pass this petition on to your friends? Clicking here will add your name:

http://pol.moveon.org/bonus/o.pl?id=15503-12460663-0.DJbrx&t=4

Thanks for all you do.

–Daniel, Peter, Justin, Marika and the rest of the team

Sources:

1. "McCaskill Proposes Compensation Cap For Private Companies Getting Federal Dollars," Senate Newsroom, January 30, 2009
http://mccaskill.senate.gov/newsroom/vid_013009.cfm

2. "What Red Ink? Wall St. Paid Fat Bonuses," The New York Times, January 28, 2009
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/29/business/29bonus.html

3. "Obama Outlines Limits on Executive Pay," The Washington Post, February 5, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51145&id=15503-12460663-0.DJbrx&t=5

4. "Despite Treasury's New Rule, Senators Aren't Giving Up Their Push to Cap CEO Pay," TPMDC, February 4, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51146&id=15503-12460663-0.DJbrx&t=6

5. "'Meet the Press' transcript for Feb. 1, 2009," MSNBC.com, February 1, 2009
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28964188/page/5/

Want to support our work? We're entirely funded by our 5 million members—no corporate contributions, no big checks from CEOs. And our tiny staff ensures that small contributions go a long way. Chip in here.

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A Call for Help

Dear MoveOn member,

President Obama's economic stimulus plan is in trouble. Conservative talking points are dominating the media's coverage and there's lots of misinformation around. Here are a few things you may not have heard about it:

1) This is a very, very good bill. As The Nation writes, "If enacted, the economic recovery plan will be one of the biggest and boldest pieces of progressive legislation in the past forty years."¹

Here are some facts about what the bill really does:

• Creates or saves 3 million to 4 million jobs in the next two years.²
• Averts "literally hundreds of thousands of teacher layoffs"—and doubles funding for the Department of Education.³
• Creates 500,000 green jobs and doubles our clean energy production.⁴
• Immediately helps unemployed folks get affordable health insurance.⁵
  

Some folks are arguing that it should be bigger, and they're probably right, but this is the best down payment on economic recovery we have seen, and it needs to be passed.

2) The stuff that's being singled out for criticism amounts to a tiny fraction of the bill—like anti-smoking programs that make up less than one-ten-thousandth of the spending.⁶ They would have you believe this is the centerpiece of the bill. It is not. This kind of nit-picking is pure politics.

3) If it doesn't pass, we're in deep trouble. Even John McCain's economic adviser estimates that without the stimulus, unemployment would top 11% by 2010, the highest level since the Great Depression.⁷

We all urgently need to get these facts out before the public. Can you write a letter to the editor of your local paper about how the stimulus will affect real people? Our tool makes writing a letter really easy. Click here to get started:

http://pol.moveon.org/lte?campaign_id=100&id=15490-12460663-pKvbClx&t=3

Last week alone, 100,000 people lost their jobs in this country.⁸ So we need to make sure the Senate takes action quickly. Nearly 200 economists from across the political spectrum wrote to Congress, agreeing:

"We do not have the luxury of a lengthy debate over the best course of action. This legislation may not be enough to solve all the economy's problems, but it is urgently needed and an important step in the right direction."⁹

But with so much rhetoric and demagoguery surrounding the bill, it won't pass unless we can get the real facts out to a wide audience. And letters to the editor by local MoveOn members are one of the best ways to set the record straight.

Our tool makes it super easy. We'll provide you with talking points to use, some tips on writing your letter, and an easy way to send it in to any newspaper in your area.
You can start writing your letter to the editor by clicking here:

http://pol.moveon.org/lte?campaign_id=100&id=15490-12460663-pKvbClx&t=4

Thanks for all you do.

–Noah, Laura, Patrick S., Anna and the rest of the team

Sources

1. "The Right is Winning Today," The Nation, February 3, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51138&id=15490-12460663-pKvbClx&t=5

2. "Senate OKs tax break for new-car buyers," Boston Globe, February 4, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51139&id=15490-12460663-pKvbClx&t=6

3. "Stimulus Plan Would Provide Flood of Aid to Education," New York Times, January 27, 2009
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/28/education/28educ.html

4. "American Recovery and Reinvestment Act," Speaker Nancy Pelosi, January 28, 2009
http://www.speaker.gov/newsroom/legislation?id=0273

5. "Relief Seen for Jobless and State in Health Care Plan," New York Times, January 27, 2009.
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/28/us/28health.html

6. "What GOP Leaders deem wasteful in Senate stimulus bill," CNN, February 3, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51140&id=15490-12460663-pKvbClx&t=7

7. "The Economic Impact of the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act," Economy.com, January 21, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51141&id=15490-12460663-pKvbClx&t=8

8. "Job cuts exceed 100,000 for the week," CNN, February 2, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51142&id=15490-12460663-pKvbClx&t=9

9. "Letter to Congress: Economist Across the Spectrum Endorse Stimulus Package", Center for American Progress Action Fund, January 27, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51130&id=15490-12460663-pKvbClx&t=10

Want to support our work? We're entirely funded by our 5 million members—no corporate contributions, no big checks from CEOs. And our tiny staff ensures that small contributions go a long way. Chip in here.

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PAID FOR BY MOVEON.ORG POLITICAL ACTION, http://pol.moveon.org/. Not authorized by any candidate or candidate's committee.

Random thoughts about love and relationships

That Otis Redding song, When a Man Loves a Woman, is the best and most consistent truisms EVER. Some of y'all need to go back and listen to it over and over again until you get it. Especially women who are pulling after men who "just aren't that into them." If he wants you, he's going to do whatever, and I mean WHATEVER it takes to get you.

I have two male casual friends who are jumping through hoops, turning cartwheels, bending over and pulling their butt cheeks apart over the women they have chosen to give their hearts to. These women can do no wrong. Now for friend A, maybe that's okay, cause, his girl is jumping through hoops too and their love and attachment to each other seems to be mutual. But dang, the boy can't even take a joke about that woman! He was telling some story about her tripping over her feet while they were at the mall and I guess I laughed too hard, cause he got all serious and self-righteous. I wanted to slap him.

Now casual friend B? His woman is taking him through the blues. But he is still smiling and he gives excuses for every episode of woman behaving badly. You can't talk about his woman either. "Y'all just don't understand. She don't mean it. She just had a bad day." Or here's a doozy I got a couple weeks ago, "well, maybe if I had've bought her the dress she wanted, she wouldn't have had to do that."

Okay, and that leads to my second random thought:

The power of the pussy. Or for my female counterparts, the awesome dick experience.

I tell ya, and unfortunately I have to include myself in this number, we can lose our everlasting mind when we find someone who can consistently hit our G-spot, can't we? I mean, what is UP with that? I really wish I understood how ONE person could accomplish what a dozen couldn't?

And now let's add a little guilt into the equation. Let's say, one of the partners cheat. But they decide to work through it and remain in the relationship. I'm thinking of another couple I know. They've been married, however long, but 5 or 6 years ago, he had an affair that produced a baby. Mind you, they got together because he was cheating WITH HER while he was involved with someone else, so I really don't understand why she's acting so surprised. Hell, that's who he is; that's what he does!!

Anyway, they opted to stay together. But that woman has worked this situation to DEATH! She has him hopping through hoops, she witholds sex, she ignores him, but gets pissy if he is out of pocket for longer than she thinks necessary. FOR FIVE YEARS! She has even made contact with HER ex-husband, the abuser, trying to seduce him into an affair and the only reason it didn't happen, was because he kept standing her up. Then ole girl goes back and confesses all to her husband. And he forgives her all. Because of his own guilt. The self-flagellation is getting on my nerves though. He keeps asking my opinion and if he keeps it up, I'm going to give it to him.

Oh, and can we talk about how people tend to take their partners for granted after awhile. You know, treat them like an old shoe; put it on when you need comfort but otherwise, just toss it into the back of the closet?

I know yet another couple, whose husband plays in a band, that is, when his wife can push him out of the house to actually work. He's really too pretty to work. Anyway, he tells her a month ago that he has been hired for a gig that will take him out of state and away for the entire month of February. She gets a call from him late one morning in which he tells her he is halfway to his destination. WHAT? Why didn't you tell me, she asks. Oh, he responds, I thought I did. Hmmm.

One of the reasons my ex is an ex is his belief that I fell at the bottom of his love food chain. He took a week long cruise with his family, which is not the part that annoys me. The day he was scheduled to return, my son and I had been eagerly anticipating him all day. We had prepared dinner, all of his favorites, my child had dusted off his cards and game board, we were ready to welcome our king back home. He called when the ship landed in Miami, "Can't wait to see you, baby." He called when the plane landed in our town, "Can't wait to see you baby, missed you terribly. How's my boy?" The airport is 20 minutes from my house. An hour and a half later (??!!), mind you, I had been calling and texting without a response from him, he calls and said that his sister wanted him to do something for her. And then another brother, who did not take the cruise, wanted him to stop by for a drink. And when he called, he was on his way over to his boy's house to tell him all about the trip. Anyway, my child and I did not actually SEE our king for two days; he had more important people placing demands on his time, you see. Our king was dethroned within the week. It's bad enough to disappoint me, but to disappoint my kid? Nah.

I love being in relationships, but I am also perfectly content when it's just me. My tolerance for the BS I just mentioned above is at a minimum, so if that is the price I would have to pay in order to be in a relationship, I'd rather be by myself.

I have two very good examples of the kind of love and commitment that I am looking for. And so, because I know it CAN happen, I can wait. My friends, some of the ones I've mentioned above, tell me that I am too hard on people, too demanding. I tell them that I have their examples, as well as some piss poor decision making in my own past, to know exactly what I DON'T want to deal with.

And then later, one or more my friends who are in stable, healthy relationships tell me,

"Sis, don't settle."

Sounds like advice I can live with.

Happiness is a choice

I think I have already expressed my intense satisfaction to have 2008 well behind me. 2009 is already promising to be much better and we are just barely into the second month.

I've been reflecting lately, trying to understand exactly WHAT is different. After all, I know that turning a page on a calendar has no real significant power and so there must be something else about this time in my life that is making the difference.

Peace reigns again in our house; my child is at a very peaceful place. In fact, things have been going so well, that we've just had our final therapy session. I think that we have both benefited and learned enough that we are now able to move ahead on our own.

My love life is still progressing s - l - o - w- l - y. But it is progressing! LOL! I figure that I'm not feeling the lack because of an abundance of love and attention given to me by my closest friends and family; I can only hope they feel the same about me. I don't know, that involvement and closeness that tends to develop around the holidays has continued even though we've all returned to our regular lives.

I feel really, really good now. I'm happy. And as I type this, I'm reminded that this time of the year is usually where I find myself at my lowest. I believe I have a form of seasonal affective disorder. As soon as daylight saving time begins and until it ends in the spring, I am typically sad, my outlook is gloomy, I feel like I have no purpose, I lack motivation and want to sleep ALL THE TIME. I think something about the extended daylight that we get during the spring and summer months energizes me in some way.

I can honestly say that I'm not THERE this year. Yaaayyy. I'm not at my maximum energy; like I said, I think the SAD thing is real for me, but I am still active, I have a purpose, I look forward to each day, and I'm not getting enough sleep because I'm trying to fit too much stuff into a single day. It's a nice change.

So, what's different?

I've got several interesting challenges at work. I am working on my novel which inspires me daily. My child's smile and his pride in being able to give me nothing but positive behavior reports, excites me and motivates me.

I'm working out again and daily looking for opportunities to be physically active. I am getting out in the evenings, when I can, surrounding myself with adults and for a few minutes, letting myself be a grown up again, not my child's mother, not my employer's employee, not my parent's daughter. It's fun.

I am consciously removing myself from negative people. They work like a virus spreading through your body. I can't let these folk in my space right now. If your mission is to do anything but love and support me, I'm looking at you through a window darkly.

Some of y'all know this gospel song, "This joy that I have, the world didn't give it and the world can't take it away." It's holding special meaning for me now; you can't let life happen to you. You have to take the reigns, and you decide how you're going to walk through this life journey. It's YOUR choice. You want happiness, you want joy? Do what you need to get it and keep it.

Examine the relationships around you. How do you feel when you see that certain person(s) or see their number on the caller ID? Are you dreading it or try to avoid it/them? Let them go. If there are activities that you've been doing that no longer fulfill you; cut them out.

Happiness, indeed, joy, is a choice.

You decide. I have.

The Runaway - David's Drama

Today, I am introducing Dr. David Cole, the fourth in a series of character studies from my up and coming novel, The Runaway.

Story premise:

A young woman is found unconscious and bleeding from a gunshot in an alley. She has no identification and there are no witnesses to her assault. She is taken to the hospital where she eventually regains consciousness but has no memory for her identity.

With the help of a police detective and her neurologist, she works to regain the pieces of her missing life. Over time, memories begin to surface, leading to clues about her identity. The clock is ticking, however, for buried within her locked subconscious are the clues not only to the murder attempt on her life, but the details of an assassination plot on an African American candidate for the presidency of the United States.

Dr. David Cole

I really don’t have a lot of time, so let’s just get to it. My job takes up all the time I want to spend on people. I’ve got way more important things to do than sit around answering a bunch of asinine questions about myself. In fact, I’ve just been assigned a new one; it’s a Jane Doe who came in through the emergency room. She has a gunshot wound to the shoulder and mild force trauma to her head. For some reason, though, she has not yet regained consciousness and it’s been nearly 48 hours now.

O-kaaaayyy. She’s insisting that I talk to you. Well, all right then. And just to let you know, I’m not going to make this pretty. You will soon come to learn that I am physically incapable of being polite! I’m going to send it straight up, without lubricant, because, that’s how I deliver it.

And you love it.

Okay, I’m going to take this seriously.

So, I’m a 45 year old neurologic surgeon. I like saying that. Okay, for you laymen types, basically, what that means is that I’m a neurologist. I provide a wide range of patient services ranging from diagnosing an illness to the management of chronic neurological disorders. I am also actively engaged in clinical and basic science research.

I’m divorced, Columbia and John Hopkins educated, and currently, I live alone. I used to be married. In fact, my wife, that is, my ex-wife, is one of the reasons I’m here in Memphis. She felt like she needed to come back here to take care of her mother; we were living in Boston at the time. Anyway, her mother was dying of cancer and she wanted to be here for her. I never did understand that. Muriel was going to be just as dead whether we were here or in Boston, so why did we have to up-end our lives?

Well, to make a short story shorter, we moved here, I started working for Methodist Hospital Systems. My ex started complaining that she couldn’t get my attention and that I left her alone too much; I worked harder. The next thing I knew, she was humping my best friend, the lawyer.

. . . they did leave me the gold fish.

I feel like I got the better part of that deal.

There’s a funny story about the divorce settlement. My wife, eh-hem, my ex-wife and her new boyfriend, were a little surprised to learn that my net worth fell a little short of what our lavish lifestyle would suggest. See, my family wealth has survived for generations due in large part to the machinigans of my robber baron great-great grandfather. The Cole family money is held in trust; while it may be administered by the first born son or surviving eldest male, the money belongs to the trust, heh-heh, untouchable in a divorce settlement. For some reason, they were both a little disappointed to find my personal net worth was just over $300,000. I guess I could’ve mentioned that during the pre-nup, huh?

When I get a quiet moment, I still crack up over that one!

Anyway, at that point, there didn’t seem much point in up-rooting myself again. Besides, I was in the middle of some really interesting and challenging cases, and moving would’ve taken time away from my work.

I do have some interests outside of work. I am a history buff and the informal historian of our family. Over time, I’ve been able to collect documents and records spanning nearly two hundred years including birth certificates, marriage licenses and journals, among other things.

My favorite time in our family history is the Civil War; I enjoy the different accounts of events of the various men and women who were eyewitnesses to historic events.

I have one ancestor, Mrs. Leticia Kramer George, or “Ms Lettie” for short. Her journals started when she was twelve years old and she meticulously maintained a journal each year until her death, at age 40. Up til about age 19, following her marriage to Herman George, her entries were mindless pre-teen and teenaged drivel. But she seemed to really get her panties in a wad over one of the slave women.

Apparently, Mr. George was spending a bit more time in the slave quarters than what was warranted and Ms. Lettie took exception to that. Her anger and bitterness is even now dripping off the pages when she discovered that the slave, Emma, became pregnant and bore Mr. George a son. As soon as the child was weaned, though, Ms. Lettie arranged to have it sold to another plantation.

The thing that really gets me about this story is that the slave Emma eventually runs away from the plantation and was never heard of again. But before she left, she apparently took Ms. Lettie’s necklace that had been given to her by Mr. George. I figure he was trying to make up for that baby thing.

According to Ms. Lettie’s journal, this necklace was very special and unique. Not only did it carry an inscription of her husband’s undying love, but Ms. Lettie believed that it held special powers.

Man, you can’t make this kinda stuff up. This is better than anything you see on tv these days! LOL!!

Ok, can I go back to work now?