Fabulousness

My FABULOUS blog pal, Sharon, has decreed that my blog is noteworthy in it's fabulousness!! I'm FABULOUS, y'all! I feel so honored. *wipes tear from corner of eye.*

Thank you, Sharon, I do my best! LOL! J/K. I really appreciate you thinking about me.

So, just as I've been tagged, I must now pass this award forward to other fabulous bloggers, which I will do in just a few.

My other assignment is to list 5 Addictions that I have. Hmmm. Ok, here goes:

MY FIVE ADDICTIONS:

1. Movies, movies and more movies. Classics, adverture, thrillers, psychological dramas, comedies, romantic comedies, mysteries. You name it, I watch it. I LOVE MOVIES!

2. Chocolate. Milk chocolate, truffles, Godiva gourmet chocolate, Hershey's kisses, Dove bars and the LOVER, all 5'11" of pure, sweet chocolate!

3. Writing. I have become so consumed with this addiction, that I carry a leather bound journal with me every where I go and it sits on the bedside table when I go to bed. And I do mean, EVERY where. People were looking at me sideways in church this morning when I pulled out my journal and started writing down an idea during the pastor's sermon. Oh well. The Lord knows my heart.

4. Red wine. I won't actually call this an addiction, since by definition, I don't meet the criteria for dependence and withdrawal, but I really, really enjoy a good bottle of red. I wish I could see the white wines in the same way, because, the reds tend to interfere with sleep (tannin) and leave me feeling hung over the next day, but the smoothness of the going down more than makes up for this inconvenience. Well, shoot, maybe this IS an addiction?

5. I'm going to call this last one a guilty pleasure instead of an addiction. Television dramas, in particular, 24, Mad Men, Perry Mason (the original series, not the junk put out in the 80's) and I Love Lucy.

The blogs I would like to tag have already been awarded, so I'll just mention them here:
The True Urban Queen, MsKnowItAll, Sitting on the Big Porch, MsTeeJaye and Mike. I strongly encourage you to stop by and check them all out.

Happy Birthday, Monopoly!

Monopoly has always been one of my favorite games. It's hard to believe that it was initially created in 1935 and has survived, been revitalized and continues to bring joy to hundreds year after year.

Happy Birthday!

Please sign petition

Dear MoveOn member,

Last Friday, Sen. Claire McCaskill took to the Senate floor and said what I imagine a lot of us have been thinking about Wall Street lately:

"They don't get it. These people are idiots. You can't use taxpayer money to pay out $18 billion in bonuses...What planet are these people on?"¹

Sen. McCaskill was reacting to the $18.4 billion in bonuses that Wall Street bankers took home in 2008. $18.4 billion going to the people who crippled our economy with their recklessness and greed and then took $700 billion of our money.²

Yesterday, President Obama took an important first step, limiting pay at companies taking bailouts going forward.³ But Congress is considering going even further, applying the limits retroactively and even taking back some of the most extravagant bonuses at firms that took taxpayer money.⁴

A huge public outcry will give them momentum and push them to real action. Can you sign this petition to Congress, urging them to act now to rein in Wall Street greed? Clicking here will add your name:

http://pol.moveon.org/bonus/o.pl?id=15503-12460663-0.DJbrx&t=3

The petition says: "Congress must place enforceable, common-sense limits on salaries at all the banks that have taken taxpayer dollars."

Wall Street's defenders make all kinds of excuses about why the bonuses were justified. They say that bonuses are an accepted part of compensation packages on Wall Street, that those receiving bonuses weren't the ones who lost their firms billions of dollars, and that they need to pay bonuses to retain top talent.⁵

Those arguments are outrageous.

If automatic bonuses are a part of Wall Street culture, that culture has to change—a firm that's still afloat only because of huge taxpayer bailouts shouldn't be paying bonuses. And while tens of thousands of Wall Street employees are losing their jobs, it's hard to believe that those still employed will go looking for new positions because they didn't get a bonus.

Sen. McCaskill showed courage standing up to the status quo. We've got to show the rest of Congress that this is the kind of leadership we need to get us out of this crisis and make the economy work for all Americans. Limiting pay at companies taking bailouts won't fix our financial system—that will take a lot more hard work—but it's an important first step.

Can you tell Congress to rein in Wall Street's excesses now and then pass this petition on to your friends? Clicking here will add your name:

http://pol.moveon.org/bonus/o.pl?id=15503-12460663-0.DJbrx&t=4

Thanks for all you do.

–Daniel, Peter, Justin, Marika and the rest of the team

Sources:

1. "McCaskill Proposes Compensation Cap For Private Companies Getting Federal Dollars," Senate Newsroom, January 30, 2009
http://mccaskill.senate.gov/newsroom/vid_013009.cfm

2. "What Red Ink? Wall St. Paid Fat Bonuses," The New York Times, January 28, 2009
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/29/business/29bonus.html

3. "Obama Outlines Limits on Executive Pay," The Washington Post, February 5, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51145&id=15503-12460663-0.DJbrx&t=5

4. "Despite Treasury's New Rule, Senators Aren't Giving Up Their Push to Cap CEO Pay," TPMDC, February 4, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51146&id=15503-12460663-0.DJbrx&t=6

5. "'Meet the Press' transcript for Feb. 1, 2009," MSNBC.com, February 1, 2009
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28964188/page/5/

Want to support our work? We're entirely funded by our 5 million members—no corporate contributions, no big checks from CEOs. And our tiny staff ensures that small contributions go a long way. Chip in here.

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PAID FOR BY MOVEON.ORG POLITICAL ACTION, http://pol.moveon.org/. Not authorized by any candidate or candidate's committee.

A Call for Help

Dear MoveOn member,

President Obama's economic stimulus plan is in trouble. Conservative talking points are dominating the media's coverage and there's lots of misinformation around. Here are a few things you may not have heard about it:

1) This is a very, very good bill. As The Nation writes, "If enacted, the economic recovery plan will be one of the biggest and boldest pieces of progressive legislation in the past forty years."¹

Here are some facts about what the bill really does:

• Creates or saves 3 million to 4 million jobs in the next two years.²
• Averts "literally hundreds of thousands of teacher layoffs"—and doubles funding for the Department of Education.³
• Creates 500,000 green jobs and doubles our clean energy production.⁴
• Immediately helps unemployed folks get affordable health insurance.⁵
  

Some folks are arguing that it should be bigger, and they're probably right, but this is the best down payment on economic recovery we have seen, and it needs to be passed.

2) The stuff that's being singled out for criticism amounts to a tiny fraction of the bill—like anti-smoking programs that make up less than one-ten-thousandth of the spending.⁶ They would have you believe this is the centerpiece of the bill. It is not. This kind of nit-picking is pure politics.

3) If it doesn't pass, we're in deep trouble. Even John McCain's economic adviser estimates that without the stimulus, unemployment would top 11% by 2010, the highest level since the Great Depression.⁷

We all urgently need to get these facts out before the public. Can you write a letter to the editor of your local paper about how the stimulus will affect real people? Our tool makes writing a letter really easy. Click here to get started:

http://pol.moveon.org/lte?campaign_id=100&id=15490-12460663-pKvbClx&t=3

Last week alone, 100,000 people lost their jobs in this country.⁸ So we need to make sure the Senate takes action quickly. Nearly 200 economists from across the political spectrum wrote to Congress, agreeing:

"We do not have the luxury of a lengthy debate over the best course of action. This legislation may not be enough to solve all the economy's problems, but it is urgently needed and an important step in the right direction."⁹

But with so much rhetoric and demagoguery surrounding the bill, it won't pass unless we can get the real facts out to a wide audience. And letters to the editor by local MoveOn members are one of the best ways to set the record straight.

Our tool makes it super easy. We'll provide you with talking points to use, some tips on writing your letter, and an easy way to send it in to any newspaper in your area.
You can start writing your letter to the editor by clicking here:

http://pol.moveon.org/lte?campaign_id=100&id=15490-12460663-pKvbClx&t=4

Thanks for all you do.

–Noah, Laura, Patrick S., Anna and the rest of the team

Sources

1. "The Right is Winning Today," The Nation, February 3, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51138&id=15490-12460663-pKvbClx&t=5

2. "Senate OKs tax break for new-car buyers," Boston Globe, February 4, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51139&id=15490-12460663-pKvbClx&t=6

3. "Stimulus Plan Would Provide Flood of Aid to Education," New York Times, January 27, 2009
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/28/education/28educ.html

4. "American Recovery and Reinvestment Act," Speaker Nancy Pelosi, January 28, 2009
http://www.speaker.gov/newsroom/legislation?id=0273

5. "Relief Seen for Jobless and State in Health Care Plan," New York Times, January 27, 2009.
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/01/28/us/28health.html

6. "What GOP Leaders deem wasteful in Senate stimulus bill," CNN, February 3, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51140&id=15490-12460663-pKvbClx&t=7

7. "The Economic Impact of the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act," Economy.com, January 21, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51141&id=15490-12460663-pKvbClx&t=8

8. "Job cuts exceed 100,000 for the week," CNN, February 2, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51142&id=15490-12460663-pKvbClx&t=9

9. "Letter to Congress: Economist Across the Spectrum Endorse Stimulus Package", Center for American Progress Action Fund, January 27, 2009
http://www.moveon.org/r?r=51130&id=15490-12460663-pKvbClx&t=10

Want to support our work? We're entirely funded by our 5 million members—no corporate contributions, no big checks from CEOs. And our tiny staff ensures that small contributions go a long way. Chip in here.

---

PAID FOR BY MOVEON.ORG POLITICAL ACTION, http://pol.moveon.org/. Not authorized by any candidate or candidate's committee.

Random thoughts about love and relationships

That Otis Redding song, When a Man Loves a Woman, is the best and most consistent truisms EVER. Some of y'all need to go back and listen to it over and over again until you get it. Especially women who are pulling after men who "just aren't that into them." If he wants you, he's going to do whatever, and I mean WHATEVER it takes to get you.

I have two male casual friends who are jumping through hoops, turning cartwheels, bending over and pulling their butt cheeks apart over the women they have chosen to give their hearts to. These women can do no wrong. Now for friend A, maybe that's okay, cause, his girl is jumping through hoops too and their love and attachment to each other seems to be mutual. But dang, the boy can't even take a joke about that woman! He was telling some story about her tripping over her feet while they were at the mall and I guess I laughed too hard, cause he got all serious and self-righteous. I wanted to slap him.

Now casual friend B? His woman is taking him through the blues. But he is still smiling and he gives excuses for every episode of woman behaving badly. You can't talk about his woman either. "Y'all just don't understand. She don't mean it. She just had a bad day." Or here's a doozy I got a couple weeks ago, "well, maybe if I had've bought her the dress she wanted, she wouldn't have had to do that."

Okay, and that leads to my second random thought:

The power of the pussy. Or for my female counterparts, the awesome dick experience.

I tell ya, and unfortunately I have to include myself in this number, we can lose our everlasting mind when we find someone who can consistently hit our G-spot, can't we? I mean, what is UP with that? I really wish I understood how ONE person could accomplish what a dozen couldn't?

And now let's add a little guilt into the equation. Let's say, one of the partners cheat. But they decide to work through it and remain in the relationship. I'm thinking of another couple I know. They've been married, however long, but 5 or 6 years ago, he had an affair that produced a baby. Mind you, they got together because he was cheating WITH HER while he was involved with someone else, so I really don't understand why she's acting so surprised. Hell, that's who he is; that's what he does!!

Anyway, they opted to stay together. But that woman has worked this situation to DEATH! She has him hopping through hoops, she witholds sex, she ignores him, but gets pissy if he is out of pocket for longer than she thinks necessary. FOR FIVE YEARS! She has even made contact with HER ex-husband, the abuser, trying to seduce him into an affair and the only reason it didn't happen, was because he kept standing her up. Then ole girl goes back and confesses all to her husband. And he forgives her all. Because of his own guilt. The self-flagellation is getting on my nerves though. He keeps asking my opinion and if he keeps it up, I'm going to give it to him.

Oh, and can we talk about how people tend to take their partners for granted after awhile. You know, treat them like an old shoe; put it on when you need comfort but otherwise, just toss it into the back of the closet?

I know yet another couple, whose husband plays in a band, that is, when his wife can push him out of the house to actually work. He's really too pretty to work. Anyway, he tells her a month ago that he has been hired for a gig that will take him out of state and away for the entire month of February. She gets a call from him late one morning in which he tells her he is halfway to his destination. WHAT? Why didn't you tell me, she asks. Oh, he responds, I thought I did. Hmmm.

One of the reasons my ex is an ex is his belief that I fell at the bottom of his love food chain. He took a week long cruise with his family, which is not the part that annoys me. The day he was scheduled to return, my son and I had been eagerly anticipating him all day. We had prepared dinner, all of his favorites, my child had dusted off his cards and game board, we were ready to welcome our king back home. He called when the ship landed in Miami, "Can't wait to see you, baby." He called when the plane landed in our town, "Can't wait to see you baby, missed you terribly. How's my boy?" The airport is 20 minutes from my house. An hour and a half later (??!!), mind you, I had been calling and texting without a response from him, he calls and said that his sister wanted him to do something for her. And then another brother, who did not take the cruise, wanted him to stop by for a drink. And when he called, he was on his way over to his boy's house to tell him all about the trip. Anyway, my child and I did not actually SEE our king for two days; he had more important people placing demands on his time, you see. Our king was dethroned within the week. It's bad enough to disappoint me, but to disappoint my kid? Nah.

I love being in relationships, but I am also perfectly content when it's just me. My tolerance for the BS I just mentioned above is at a minimum, so if that is the price I would have to pay in order to be in a relationship, I'd rather be by myself.

I have two very good examples of the kind of love and commitment that I am looking for. And so, because I know it CAN happen, I can wait. My friends, some of the ones I've mentioned above, tell me that I am too hard on people, too demanding. I tell them that I have their examples, as well as some piss poor decision making in my own past, to know exactly what I DON'T want to deal with.

And then later, one or more my friends who are in stable, healthy relationships tell me,

"Sis, don't settle."

Sounds like advice I can live with.

Happiness is a choice

I think I have already expressed my intense satisfaction to have 2008 well behind me. 2009 is already promising to be much better and we are just barely into the second month.

I've been reflecting lately, trying to understand exactly WHAT is different. After all, I know that turning a page on a calendar has no real significant power and so there must be something else about this time in my life that is making the difference.

Peace reigns again in our house; my child is at a very peaceful place. In fact, things have been going so well, that we've just had our final therapy session. I think that we have both benefited and learned enough that we are now able to move ahead on our own.

My love life is still progressing s - l - o - w- l - y. But it is progressing! LOL! I figure that I'm not feeling the lack because of an abundance of love and attention given to me by my closest friends and family; I can only hope they feel the same about me. I don't know, that involvement and closeness that tends to develop around the holidays has continued even though we've all returned to our regular lives.

I feel really, really good now. I'm happy. And as I type this, I'm reminded that this time of the year is usually where I find myself at my lowest. I believe I have a form of seasonal affective disorder. As soon as daylight saving time begins and until it ends in the spring, I am typically sad, my outlook is gloomy, I feel like I have no purpose, I lack motivation and want to sleep ALL THE TIME. I think something about the extended daylight that we get during the spring and summer months energizes me in some way.

I can honestly say that I'm not THERE this year. Yaaayyy. I'm not at my maximum energy; like I said, I think the SAD thing is real for me, but I am still active, I have a purpose, I look forward to each day, and I'm not getting enough sleep because I'm trying to fit too much stuff into a single day. It's a nice change.

So, what's different?

I've got several interesting challenges at work. I am working on my novel which inspires me daily. My child's smile and his pride in being able to give me nothing but positive behavior reports, excites me and motivates me.

I'm working out again and daily looking for opportunities to be physically active. I am getting out in the evenings, when I can, surrounding myself with adults and for a few minutes, letting myself be a grown up again, not my child's mother, not my employer's employee, not my parent's daughter. It's fun.

I am consciously removing myself from negative people. They work like a virus spreading through your body. I can't let these folk in my space right now. If your mission is to do anything but love and support me, I'm looking at you through a window darkly.

Some of y'all know this gospel song, "This joy that I have, the world didn't give it and the world can't take it away." It's holding special meaning for me now; you can't let life happen to you. You have to take the reigns, and you decide how you're going to walk through this life journey. It's YOUR choice. You want happiness, you want joy? Do what you need to get it and keep it.

Examine the relationships around you. How do you feel when you see that certain person(s) or see their number on the caller ID? Are you dreading it or try to avoid it/them? Let them go. If there are activities that you've been doing that no longer fulfill you; cut them out.

Happiness, indeed, joy, is a choice.

You decide. I have.

The Runaway - David's Drama

Today, I am introducing Dr. David Cole, the fourth in a series of character studies from my up and coming novel, The Runaway.

Story premise:

A young woman is found unconscious and bleeding from a gunshot in an alley. She has no identification and there are no witnesses to her assault. She is taken to the hospital where she eventually regains consciousness but has no memory for her identity.

With the help of a police detective and her neurologist, she works to regain the pieces of her missing life. Over time, memories begin to surface, leading to clues about her identity. The clock is ticking, however, for buried within her locked subconscious are the clues not only to the murder attempt on her life, but the details of an assassination plot on an African American candidate for the presidency of the United States.

Dr. David Cole

I really don’t have a lot of time, so let’s just get to it. My job takes up all the time I want to spend on people. I’ve got way more important things to do than sit around answering a bunch of asinine questions about myself. In fact, I’ve just been assigned a new one; it’s a Jane Doe who came in through the emergency room. She has a gunshot wound to the shoulder and mild force trauma to her head. For some reason, though, she has not yet regained consciousness and it’s been nearly 48 hours now.

O-kaaaayyy. She’s insisting that I talk to you. Well, all right then. And just to let you know, I’m not going to make this pretty. You will soon come to learn that I am physically incapable of being polite! I’m going to send it straight up, without lubricant, because, that’s how I deliver it.

And you love it.

Okay, I’m going to take this seriously.

So, I’m a 45 year old neurologic surgeon. I like saying that. Okay, for you laymen types, basically, what that means is that I’m a neurologist. I provide a wide range of patient services ranging from diagnosing an illness to the management of chronic neurological disorders. I am also actively engaged in clinical and basic science research.

I’m divorced, Columbia and John Hopkins educated, and currently, I live alone. I used to be married. In fact, my wife, that is, my ex-wife, is one of the reasons I’m here in Memphis. She felt like she needed to come back here to take care of her mother; we were living in Boston at the time. Anyway, her mother was dying of cancer and she wanted to be here for her. I never did understand that. Muriel was going to be just as dead whether we were here or in Boston, so why did we have to up-end our lives?

Well, to make a short story shorter, we moved here, I started working for Methodist Hospital Systems. My ex started complaining that she couldn’t get my attention and that I left her alone too much; I worked harder. The next thing I knew, she was humping my best friend, the lawyer.

. . . they did leave me the gold fish.

I feel like I got the better part of that deal.

There’s a funny story about the divorce settlement. My wife, eh-hem, my ex-wife and her new boyfriend, were a little surprised to learn that my net worth fell a little short of what our lavish lifestyle would suggest. See, my family wealth has survived for generations due in large part to the machinigans of my robber baron great-great grandfather. The Cole family money is held in trust; while it may be administered by the first born son or surviving eldest male, the money belongs to the trust, heh-heh, untouchable in a divorce settlement. For some reason, they were both a little disappointed to find my personal net worth was just over $300,000. I guess I could’ve mentioned that during the pre-nup, huh?

When I get a quiet moment, I still crack up over that one!

Anyway, at that point, there didn’t seem much point in up-rooting myself again. Besides, I was in the middle of some really interesting and challenging cases, and moving would’ve taken time away from my work.

I do have some interests outside of work. I am a history buff and the informal historian of our family. Over time, I’ve been able to collect documents and records spanning nearly two hundred years including birth certificates, marriage licenses and journals, among other things.

My favorite time in our family history is the Civil War; I enjoy the different accounts of events of the various men and women who were eyewitnesses to historic events.

I have one ancestor, Mrs. Leticia Kramer George, or “Ms Lettie” for short. Her journals started when she was twelve years old and she meticulously maintained a journal each year until her death, at age 40. Up til about age 19, following her marriage to Herman George, her entries were mindless pre-teen and teenaged drivel. But she seemed to really get her panties in a wad over one of the slave women.

Apparently, Mr. George was spending a bit more time in the slave quarters than what was warranted and Ms. Lettie took exception to that. Her anger and bitterness is even now dripping off the pages when she discovered that the slave, Emma, became pregnant and bore Mr. George a son. As soon as the child was weaned, though, Ms. Lettie arranged to have it sold to another plantation.

The thing that really gets me about this story is that the slave Emma eventually runs away from the plantation and was never heard of again. But before she left, she apparently took Ms. Lettie’s necklace that had been given to her by Mr. George. I figure he was trying to make up for that baby thing.

According to Ms. Lettie’s journal, this necklace was very special and unique. Not only did it carry an inscription of her husband’s undying love, but Ms. Lettie believed that it held special powers.

Man, you can’t make this kinda stuff up. This is better than anything you see on tv these days! LOL!!

Ok, can I go back to work now?